Everyday I try to fill up all my schedule so that I won't get bored. Yet, after all the busy schedule(all the exercises class), when I drive home, deep in my heart, I felt so lonely. I have friends everywhere, I'm not alone, but I felt lonely. Today, wehn I drive home in the middle of the night, again, I cried. I missed mom. Why why why. Keep on telling myself that I cannot get moody, cannot let myself so down, please cheer up, I'm trying...
Tonight 1028pm, I'm in the shop doing close sales month. My cat, Bobby was disappeared before I closed the shop. This morning when I came, he wasn't there, at the usual place, I felt so guilty and sad. I thought it was dead. People said a good cat will never die in the owner house. SO I thought maybe he was gone. I felt bad as I never treat him good. Since mummy gone, it always starve. Sometimes I don't even feed him fish. It was my fault, because I was too lazy to go to wet market just to buy fish for it. I didn't cook in a long time. The prawn and cabbage stil in the fridge until today. It's been a month. I get lazy everyday. My life is empty. I don't know why I live in the world as I can't do the things that I love. I can't do my favourite jobs. I am alone in this planet. I don't like to talk to sis and bro. I don't know why. Evrytime I talked to them, I lost patient. This is not me. Maybe I'm too far from the God, which results in losing direction in life.
Tonight, I just cry n cry n cry...I am so lonely deep in my heart. Where the happy go lucky Ming gone? Where the strong girl gone? Where the girl who always bring happiness to people around her? where where where???
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